It sucks that I'm this constant disappointment. Honestly, all the stress we kids (if we can still call ourselves kids that is) face today, its fucking crazy. How anyone puts up with it and remains sane is beyond me. Though you know, maybe all this stress would never have existed if I wasn't perpetually last minute girl. Its 30 days or something till A's. Clarissa's gonna attempt to mug 2 years worth of content in 30 days. God help me. Oh and all of you too I suppose.

I came up with a solution to all my time wasting problems. Considering I'm always in front of the com doing absolutely nothing, I'm gonna give Daddy my main wire or something to bring to work everyday. Then I can't use the com anymore! But knowing Dad he'll lose it or forget to bring it back everyday. Then howww. I cannot use my aspire excuse to use the computer anymore.

If you haven't heard already, I'm single again. Probably a little more permanent than usual this time, I think I forgot how fucking awesome it was being single. We'll see how it goes, the next time I jump back into a relationship I'll make sure he's
a) not boring
b) actually has cash some of the time
c) worth investing all the potential heartache in
d) someone I can stand for more than five minutes
e) I suppose attractive wouldn't hurt either

I'm not saying Sam wasn't any of these things (heaven forbid someone finds another reason to find fault with me, dissing my ex on blogger and all) but I mean it would have been good if we hadn't argued so much. Actually I don't know. Its too early for me to analyse it yet.

Though I'll say one thing. I'm sad to have lost Botak Jones Toa Payoh to him and his friends now. Who knows, maybe one day he'll stop being so fucking mad at me and get over it. And then I can eat yummy burgers and get tipsy all over again, while only paying for me. Oh joy.

Its off to take a nap now, wake up and do mitosis by the end of the day! And that damn econs case study as well. Byebyebye.

Keep thinking I'm that bitch if you want, it doesn't fucking affect me in the least.

It is sad however, that that has to go out to more than one person. More than two people. Okay four. I need to stop picking fights/retaliating.

The last couple of days, all I've been thinking, is that I wish I could be one of those fuckers still full of hope about every damn thing. And every single time that thought's popped into my head, I keep mentally slapping myself for the emo-ness.

I don't know what's been wrong with me the last couple of days. Its like everything everyone does gets on my nerves. And no one's been getting it worse than the boyfriend. Oh and my family I suppose, but they're getting pretty used to my moods so they don't count.

Everything the boyfriend's done lately has just irritated me beyond belief. Its crazy, and I dunno, I'm undecided if the things I'm mad about are petty or warranted. I wish I had someone to talk to about all this shit. Like someone else's perspective. Someone who won't say I told you so. Someone who can give me an objective view on everything. Actually no, scratch that. Half the issues I have with him I don't want anyone else to know about, cause its fucking embarrassing that a girl like me still has to deal with shit like this. No no, not saying I'm gorgeous or whatever ANDRE TAN before you quote me and analyse this shit, I mean a girl who's been in relationships before and should know better and be treated better and whatever. NO he's not fucking stalking me again or whatever, its a whole different set of problems now. I think. Or maybe its rewind 2 years back and press play and you'll see the same shit. Fuck I don't know what I'm talking about, as if I ever do.

Figures the only time I'm bothered to blog is when dre isn't online for me to bitch to. Hahaha. Then he can call me fat and I can feel better about myself.


P.S This post does not in any way indicate that my blog is alive again. Temporary resuscitations such as the above might occur occasionally, but only in instances where CPR is performed by a guy equivalent in hotness to Ryan Phillipe. I wouldn't advise you to keep checking back everyday or week to see if I've updated yet, maybe once a month. I'll throw out that same excuse you see everywhere else, I'm busy studying for A's lah! Total bs but whatever.